PT is down for 2 days :(

So this blog is all I have,

And i'm scared.
I pee'd blood again.
A girl in my class has the same symptoms,
And it's either kidney infection or kidney stones.
But i'm worrying about the STI possibility.
Mum doesn't know i've had sex.
I could never tell her!
I mean yeah i'm 17, it ain't such a bad thing.
But it's my mum.
I don't tell her those things!

Anyway, the girl in tutor,
She's very nice,
Said go to the doctors,
And was surprised it could be an STI,
And doubts that.
So I should go.
But no one is home.
I'm alone.
In a bit of pain,
Very faint.
And worried.
Last time she had it though.
She didn't realise what it was.
And it got quite bad...
She also lost a lot of weight because of it.
All i've done is fast.
Ha.
But what if I could lose more weight?
Not worth risking my kidneys over though.

Talk about fasting.
I made it 7 days.
If I fasted till Thursday.
Saturday would be a disaster.
I'd binge like crazy.
Or i'd put on loads of weight,
As my body would absorb...
EVERYTHING.
So i'm introducing food already.

Breakfast;
Half an Apple (50)

Yup, that's me introducing food.
Fuck it, I was full after just that.
Cut it in half,
Quarters,
De-cored it.
Cut it into...
Eighths.
Bit half of one,
Chomp, chomp.
Slurp of cranberry juice.
Next 16th.
Chomp chomp.
Slurp cranberry juice,
Stomach full after eating half.

Nice one :)

I'm not complaining.
The less I can manage,
The better.

Might eat something for dinner.
Might not.
Mum knows I don't feel well,
So won't force anything on me.

Which is good.

Blog over, for now.
Without PT,
I can imagine...
I will blog so much more,

Stay strong
xox