Well...

Blurted out to mum about Emma,

So she knows,

She told dad,

He knows too.

They tried to talk to me,

I'd only known about it myself,

For a few hours.

And they were already trying to get me to scrape together an idea of how I was feeling, what was going to happen, what I would do.

Etc.

As if I know.

I'm numb.

I can't tell a thing.

Texted JB in desperation.

I want out of the house.

Please.

He came and picked me up in his car,

Was fairly quiet for the first,

I don't know.

45 minutes?

I was thinking, couldn't stop thinking.

And there wasn't much to say.

Well there was.

Just couldn't start a good conversation.

Eventually,

I brightened up,

Took a while though.

Ended up having a laugh,

Etc...*smooch-smooch*

Took my mind of things,

Hardy-ha.

Had half a boiled sweet;

He insisted.

Pineapple flavour (15)

Home now.

Thinking again.

Having some strawberries (20)

While I think.

Todays total,

Now theres something to do.

Um.

50 + 118 = 168

168 +(15+20) = 203

203 calories.

Sounds a bit,

High.

Higher then yesterday.

Which was what?

62calories?

Metabolism booster,

That's what today is.

Lower again tomorrow?

Yes please.

Hospital tomorrow night.

With Emma.

I'm so numb.

So numb.

Numb.

...

Stay strong

xox